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Marriage & Couples

How do you know when it’s time to get help?

Building and caring for a relationship takes time, energy and commitment.

With time, we are bound to get ‘hit’ by various waves in life and they can negatively effect our intimate relationships. Often people put off getting help until it’s too late and the will to work on things has faded on one or both sides. Love doesn’t have to die! There is help and hope through couples counselling.

Seven Signs You Might Need Professional Help

1. Poor Communication

If you find that your level of communication has gotten worse and you are feeling lonely or disconnected in your relationship. Sometimes couples even find they start to avoid potential conflicts and end up in a place of not talking about their problems. This doesn’t just go away on its own.

2. Decreased Sexual Intimacy

An absence or sudden decrease in sexual intimacy can point to danger. Is your spouse suddenly acting in ways that are not normal for them in this area? Sexual intimacy is a powerful and important piece of marital harmony. Reinforcing the bond can go a long way to strengthening the relationship.

3. Having Trouble Letting Go of the Past.

Getting stuck on old hurts can lead to problems. Whenever there has been a traumatic event in the marriage, like an affair or loss of a child, it is possible that one partner may struggle with letting things go. Professional help can get you unstuck and move forward. Each person processes grief and trauma differently so a little extra help can make a big difference.

4. Recurring Issues

If the ‘same old’ arguments or problems continue to resurface and not reach points of resolve, you have probably hit a sticking point. These sticking points don’t have to injure the intimacy of the marriage/ relationship. A little professional help can help the couple to navigate through the recurring issues so they don’t lead to years of pain or disappointment.

5. Finances

They say sex, money and in-laws can be the most distressing issues in a marriage. If one spouse keeps control of the finances and won’t disclose what is going on with money and debt, it might be time to speak up. Financial stress can erode a marriage like nothing else.

6. Children

Ah yes — the greatest joys and potential sorrows! Children add a dynamic of stress to even the best relationships, especially if you are not in a position of being a united front. Being in agreement re: how many children you will have, how you want to raise them/discipline, etc. are potential land mines if not talked through effectively.

7. You still Love Your Spouse!

This is a very good reason to seek professional help. If you still love your spouse and want things to work, it is imperative to get help sooner than later. Early intervention can prevent the pains of a break-up and allow for a beautiful restoration. Some wise couples even invest in regular tune-ups for their relationship — booking a session or two every year just to enrich and invest in their marriage.

Contact Fresh Hope Counselling today and book an initial session to get started.